| This journal |
[09 Sep 2008|06:35pm] |
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This journal is now strangers only.
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| hey |
[11 Feb 2007|12:42pm] |
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hey, watch old greg
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| hey |
[05 Dec 2005|11:32pm] |
I haven't updated this in months.
Now I have.
please reply with a guess about what happened in my life since you've heard from me last.
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| roomate |
[23 Aug 2005|06:13pm] |
I need a roomate.
for September.
I don't want to have to pay double my usual rent.
do you want to live with me? or know anyone that isn't an assface that wants to live with me?
if you do. that would be helpful.
Love,
Jeremy
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| My trip to Quebec |
[07 Aug 2005|01:54am] |
My trip to Quebec, a review.
In English
I'm home from Canada. Back in America where the people are fat jerks.
It's good to be home. kind of.
I'm rewriting this because I typed about 5 pages of stuff earlier about it and with a simple click of a button it all disappeared.
On Sunday I packed up my stuff and met my coworkers at work to take our rental Kia Sedona to Quebec for a week. Before I even left I felt like I was going to have a bad time. Something about my constant negative attitude and consistently bad luck gave me that feeling.
My company sent us to Canada to fix 1300 ibooks that were owned by a school in the Eastern Townships. It's not really legal for us to work in Canada so we had to lie our way through the border a little bit. The cover story was that we were going to a training conference for computer technicians. It didn't really go over all that well. I'm not entirely used to lying so I didn't do a very good job of it at the border. They pulled us over and searched the vehicle. Not too much though, they didn't gut the thing, they just kind of took stuff out and looked around. Our story was at least somewhat believable even if my mannerisms about lying my way into another country weren't. One of the guys I work with got hassled a bit because he'd had an OUI as a minor. They almost didn't let him in. That would have been a huge pain in the ass to drive him all the way back to Portland from Canada. I think I would have killed him.
After driving through a lot of cornfields we finally arrived at our motel. Our motel that was really crappy and was supposed to have wireless internet. Okay, it did have wireless internet, however, it was almost completely nonfunctional, making my only connection to the outside world almost completely nonfunctional as well. That's alright, what did I need the internet for anyway?
The work was boring, we did it exceptionally fast, so we got to leave a day early. I'm really happy about leaving a day early.
There are things that are different about Quebec. I will try to list them here.
Food. The food in Quebec (the part I was in anyway) is absolutely disgusting. Even the worst American food is much better and more satisfying than anything I ate while I was there. Every restaurant has cottage cheese on the menu and everyone loves poutine.
Girls. The girls in Quebec were far more attractive than the girls in Maine. I wasn't surprised because there aren't all that many atttractive girls in Maine anyway. For some reason, probably the bad food, there isn't a widespread obesity problem there. That I could see anyway. If I go to a bar or club or something here there will be like 2 maybe 3 girls that are attractive. Because they're the only attractive girls within a 50 mile radius, they're huge bitches about everything. Up there, there were probably 2 or 3 girls that weren't attractive. It was completely different. My only complaint is that none of them seem to have upper lips.
People in general. Almost everyone in Quebec is short. The majority of the population seemed to be 167cm or less.
Cleanliness. I did not see a single bum. There wasn't much trash in the streets. Portland, on the other hand, is full of bums and there is trash everywhere.
Thrift stores. Are even worse than thrift stores here. Absolutely nothing worth buying.
Money. All money less than 5$C is in coin form. I found this to be obnoxious. Even though there are 2$ coins, I don't want to have 14$ in change in my pockets.
Gas stations. ARE ASSHOLES. In the US if you pay for gas at the pump, they charge you for the amount of gas that you pumped. In Canada, they charge you 100$C. No matter what the amount you pumped is. Then a week later (supposedly) they give you your money back. I'm extremely angry about this. If I had known that all my money would be taken away from me for a week because I pumped gas, I would have paid cash.
Cigarettes. I already covered this one in my previous blog. Canadian cigarettes are disgusting. They're all about the same quality as Hi-Val cigarettes in America.
Some other things. I was surprised how many places accepted American money, I made a point to not do this, but my coworkers paid for a lot of stuff with American cash. The clerks and waitresses and whatnot would gladly break out the calculator and figure out the conversion then accept the cash with no problem. Also, the language thing. The area I was in was fairly English speaking. Enough so that you'd go somewhere and everyone would be speaking English but everything written was in French. I thought that was kind of strange. There were some people that spoke no English, they were fun to talk to. One girl wanted me to swear at her in English, I was kind of drunk and in a good mood so I couldn't really go off on a rant about anything. I'm sorry French girl, I'll try harder next time.
All in all, I had a bad trip. There were some fun times but for the most part it was expensive and really inconvenient. If it was for pleasure and in some other part of Quebec where maybe more fun times were to be had, I think I would have enjoyed myself a lot. However, considering the situation, I just stressed a lot of the time and got really annoyed.
I still don't have my money back from the gas station, so I'm poor as hell right now. Hopefully I can last for a few days until I get it back.
En français
Vendredi, Août 05, 2005
Mon voyage vers le Québec, une revue.
Je suis à la maison du Canada. En arrière en Amérique où le peuple est de grosses secousses.
Il est bon d'être à la maison sorte de.
Je récris ceci parce que j'ai dactylographié environ 5 pages de substance plus tôt à son sujet et avec un clic simple d'un bouton il a tout disparu.
Dimanche j'ai emballé vers le haut de ma substance et ai rencontré mes collègues au travail pour prendre notre Kia de location Sedona au Québec pendant une semaine. Avant qu'I soit même parti je me suis senti comme j'allais avoir un mauvais temps. Quelque chose au sujet de ma attitude négative constante et chance uniformément mauvaise m'a donné ce sentiment.
Ma compagnie nous a envoyés au Canada aux ibooks 1300 de difficulté qui ont été possédés par une école dans les banlieues noires orientales. Elle n'est pas vraiment légale pour que nous fonctionnent au Canada ainsi nous avons dû nous trouver notre voie par la frontière un peu. L'histoire de couverture était que nous allions à une conférence de formation pour des techniciens d'ordinateur. Elle vraiment n'est pas allée l'excédent tout qui bon. Je ne suis pas entièrement habitué au mensonge ainsi je n'ai pas fait un travail très bon de lui à la frontière. Ils nous ont tirés plus d'et ont recherché le véhicule. Pas trop cependant, ils n'ont pas étripé la chose, ils juste aimables à ont enlevé la substance et ont regardé autour. Notre histoire était au moins quelque peu crédible même si mes manières au sujet du mensonge ma manière dans un autre pays n'étaient pas. Un des types que je travaille avec obtient disputé un peu parce qu'il a eu un OUI en tant que mineur. Ils presque ne l'ont pas laissé dedans. C'aurait été une douleur énorme dans l'âne pour le conduire toute la manière de nouveau à Portland par le Canada. Je pense que je l'aurais tué.
Après conduite par beaucoup de champs de maïs nous sommes finalement arrivés à notre motel. Notre motel qui était vraiment misérable et a été censé avoir l'Internet sans fil. Ok, il a eu l'Internet sans fil, cependant, il était presque totalement non fonctionnel, établissant mon seulement rapport au monde extérieur presque totalement non fonctionnel aussi bien. Cela est bien, que j'a eu besoin de l'Internet pour de toute façon ?
Le travail ennuyeux, nous l'avons fait particulièrement rapide, ainsi nous avons dû pour partir un jour tôt. Je suis vraiment heureux au sujet de laisser un jour tôt.
Il y a des choses qui sont différentes au sujet du Québec. J'essayerai de les énumérer ici.
Nourriture. La nourriture au Québec (la pièce j'étais dedans de toute façon) est absolument répugnante. Même la nourriture américaine la plus gâtée est bien mieux et plus satisfaisante que quelque chose j'a mangé tandis que j'étais là. Chaque restaurant a le fromage blanc sur le menu et chacun aime le poutine.
Filles. Les filles au Québec étaient plus attrayantes bien que les filles au Maine. Je n'ai pas été étonné parce qu'il n'y a pas tout que beaucoup de filles atttractive au Maine de toute façon. Pour quelque raison, probablement la nourriture gâtée, il n'y a pas un problème répandu d'obésité là. Que je pourrais voir de toute façon. Si je vais chez une barre ou un club ou quelque chose ici là sera comme 2 peut-être 3 filles qui sont attirantes. Puisqu'elles sont les seules filles attirantes dans un rayon de 50 milles, elles sont les chiennes énormes au sujet de tout. Vers le haut de lui, il y avait probablement 2 ou 3 filles qui n'étaient pas attirantes. Il était complètement différent. Ma seulement plainte est qu'aucun d'eux ne semble avoir les lèvres supérieures.
Les gens en général. Presque chacun au Québec est court. La majorité de la population a semblé être 167cm ou moins.
Propreté. Je n'ai pas vu un clochard simple. Il n'y avait pas beaucoup de détritus dans les rues. Portland, d'autre part, est plein des clochards et il y a de détritus partout.
Magasins d'épargne. Soyez encore plus mauvais que des magasins d'épargne ici. Absolument rien intéressant acheter.
Argent. Tout l'argent moins que 5#c est sous la forme de pièce de monnaie. J'ai trouvé ceci pour être désagréable. Quoiqu'il y ait les pièces de monnaie 2$, je ne veux pas avoir 14$ dans le changement de mes poches.
Stations de gaz. SONT LES ABRUTIS. Aux USA si vous payez le gaz à la pompe, ils vous chargent pour la quantité de gaz que vous avez pompée. Au Canada, ils vous chargent 100#c. N'importe ce que la quantité que vous avez pompée est. Alors une semaine plus tard (censément) ils vous donnent votre argent en arrière. Je suis extrêmement fâché à ce sujet. Si j'avais su que tout mon argent serait emporté de moi pendant une semaine parce que j'ai pompé le gaz, j'aurais payé l'argent comptant.
Cigarettes. J'ai déjà couvert celui-ci dans mon blog précédent. Les cigarettes canadiennes sont répugnantes. Elles sont toutes qualité à peu près identique en tant que Bonjour-Val cigarettes en Amérique.
Quelques autres choses. J'ai été étonné combien d'endroits ont accepté l'argent américain, j'ai incité un point à à ne pas faire ceci, mais mes collègues payés beaucoup de substance avec l'argent comptant américain. Les commis et les serveuses et la chose éclateraient heureusement la calculatrice et la figure hors de la conversion acceptent alors l'argent comptant sans le problème. En outre, la chose de langue. Le secteur que j'étais était dedans assez d'expression anglaise. Assez de sorte que vous alliez quelque part et chacun parleraient anglais mais tout écrit était en français. J'ai pensé qui était genre d'étrange. Il y avait certains qui n'ont parlé aucun anglais, ils étaient amusement à parler à. Une fille a voulu que je jurât à elle en anglais, j'étais sorte d'une humeur ivre et dans bonne ainsi je ne pourrais pas vraiment aller au loin sur un rant au sujet de n'importe quoi. Je suis désolé que la fille française, j'essaye le moment prochain plus difficile.
Au total, j'ai eu un mauvais voyage. Il y avait quelques fois d'amusement mais pour la plupart il était cher et vraiment incommode. S'il était pour le plaisir et dans une autre région du Québec où peut-être plus de temps d'amusement devaient être eus, je pense que je me serais apprécié beaucoup. Cependant, vu la situation, j'ai juste souligné beaucoup du temps et ai obtenu vraiment gêné.
Je n'ai toujours pas mon dos d'argent de la station de gaz, ainsi je suis pauvre comme enfer en ce moment. Si tout va bien je bidon dure pendant quelques jours jusqu'à ce que je le récupère.
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| I'm kind of a bitch about service |
[24 Jul 2005|10:33pm] |
Fast food service to be specific.
I've known this for a while and some of my friends know it as well. I didn't realize it was so intense though. Sometimes it takes other people to get you to realize things about yourself.
I'll go through some of my history with you of my extreme rage at poor fast food service.
About 2 years ago I was going through the drive-thru at KFC, a place that I frequent infrequently. I wanted the Chicken Strips Meal, because they're tender and crispy and really good. Well, you see, with the meal you get 3 strips, and it's meal ..2, or at least it was at the time. So I, in haste, ordered a ..3, connecting the amount of strips I would be getting with the meal number. It was completely my mistake(but I don't know that yet, hold on). When the girl gave me the bag at the window I was wondering why it was so small, it wasn't in the usual serving platter. I remember thinking to myself that something seemed wrong but dismissed it for a second because I thought maybe they had some sort of new packaging. I tore into the bag and realized I didn't get what I wanted. Everything turned red......
"THIS ISN'T WHAT I ORDER!" I screamed as I pointed my finger and it shook like a crazy cartoon villian, or like Lewis Black.
"You order a ..3 sir." she said
"AHHHHHHRRRRRRHKET:KLJWET:KLJWER!!OIUEF:LJDSF FUCK FUCK FUCK YOU!! YOU'RE A STUPID BITCH" I think I said.
Then I drove around and went through the drive thru again to look at the menu, I noticed I was wrong and sped away. Not to return for another 3 weeks or so when there would be an entirely new staff do to the speedy fast food turnover rate of employment.
Story 2, Wendy's late night hell.
About 6 months after the KFC incident I'd learned some lessons. I didn't want to blow up like a poor Arab teenager trying to make sure his family has a better life anymore.
I was feeling particularly hungry for some Wendy's burgers. I went to the Mill Creek Wendy's in South Portland and stopped to look at the menu. I thought to myself. "Hmm...a Double with bacon seems like it would really hit the spot."
I made sure to get my numbers right, the Double is a ..2. Remember to tell them you want bacon.
"Welcome to Wendy's i'll be right with you" the box said.".....may I help you?"
"yeah, I'd like a number two with bacon" I said.
"what would you like for a drink?"
"Sprite" I said confidently. I always get Sprite at night because I know I'll never be able to sleep if I drink a Coke.
"That'll be $5.63"...or whatever it was, something like that.
I pulled up to the window, paid the man and waited while they made my food. He hands me the bag and I begin to drive away with my knee while ripping into the delicious present I had just bought myself.
A double you see, is a burger with two burger patties in it, and bacon, that's a really good meat that people get from pigs.
My burger had none of those things. It was just one burger patty, and I couldn't find any bacon anywhere. I started to get mad but calmed myself a bit remembering how I flew off the handle at the KFC girl in the past. I didn't want to be an asshole when it could have been my fault. I drove back through the drive thru and asked.
"A number 2 is a double, correct?"
"yeah" the guy said
"oh, well, I think you screwed up my order, I ordered and paid for a double with bacon, and I got a burger with only a single burger patty on it." I said
"what do you want me to do about it?" the guy sneered like the real cocksucking bastard he is. Then he closed the window on me and started to walk away. I wasn't very happy about that, so I started yelling loudly.
"HEY YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE I PAID FOR A DOUBLE WITH BACON, FIX MY BURGER OR GIVE ME MY MONEY BACK!" I was furiously screaming at the window until he opened it up and took my burger. There was no way I would ever eat anything they were going to bring back to me to correct my order, there's probably 32 different brands of shit and semen on the replacement after I yelled at them and called them fucking assholes. Regardless, to prove a point, I must at least make them make the replacement.
I sit there for a minute and a different guy comes back with the new burger, the other guy is behind him. He hangs out the window and hands it to me, then with a really really sarcastic asshole voice he says.
"ENJOY YOUR BURGER SIR!"
I check the burger, pull forward about one foot and SMASH THE BURGER AGAINST THE SIDE OF THE WINDOW. Then I yelled "FUCK YOU!" and drove away.
I went to the other wendy's over by the mall and explained my situation to them, they were really nice about it and gave me a comment card and had me talk to the manager. Hopefully because they're owned by the same people someone got in trouble. I filled out the card and sent it in the next day.
Story ..3. TACO BELL BITCH
When I worked in Bangor I used to eat at Taco Bell a lot, because it's really good, AND GOOD FOR YOU! Okay, maybe not so good for you, but it's cheap and tastes like an orgasm feels. Since moving to Portland Taco Bell has been a rare guest in my life that seems empty without it. So, when I have the opportunity to eat it, I do, even if I have to puke up something else to make room. On Saturday Seth and Jenna were going to the mall, I know there's a taco bell there and I was bored so i decided to go with them. After wandering around the awkward boring mall for a while I decided I wanted to get the taco bell before we left. I walked up and waited in line, making sure I knew exactly wanted before I ordered. I chose the 3 soft tacos meal, it was going to be delicious! The fat teenaged goth girl working behind the counter must have been having a bad day or something because she had no patience for even the slightest vocal pause.
"what would you like to order?" her.
"I'd like the number 8...um" I said. Then she rolled her eyes and sighed before I got to tell her what kind of drink I wanted. I have very little patience for fat goth girls that work in the mall at taco bell. So I said.
"FUCK YOU!" and walked away. I resisted my urge to cause a bigger scene in the food court.
Story 4, WENDY'S AGAIN.
This story isn't as dramatic as the others, I didn't actually confront anyone about it. After leaving the mall, I was still hungry, so were Seth and Jenna. We went to Wendy's. I ordered a ..6 with cheese and bacon. I recommend that to anyone going to Wendy's, the spicy chicken sandwich is even more amazing with cheese and bacon. I was very specific to say
"A number six with no sauce, bacon and cheese. Only ONE SLICE OF CHEESE."
When I got my sandwich I noticed there were two slices of cheese. At first I felt hurt, then I felt angry at the man that caused my hurting. I can't believe that short little bastard would do that to me! I was about ready to run behind the counter and kill him, Seth and Jenna said I was overreacting and that I'm crazy. I don't think I'm crazy, I just don't think they've been wronged like I have in the past. Seth didn't understand why I get so mad when gay dudes try to pick me up when I'm walking down the street until it happened to him too. So I'll accept their ignorance as an excuse to not kill everyone that was working in the Wendy's that day.
Next time though, they better get my order right.
THEY BETTER GET IT RIGHT IF THEY KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR THEM!
That's just how I feel.
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| new fun game |
[01 Jul 2005|01:53am] |
if you're going to a bar, the funnest thing to do is play spin the bottle
even if no one else wants to play
just show them that the bottle is pointing to them and then kiss them
it works, kind of
I recommend finding a bar with lots of hot chicks
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| I |
[16 Jun 2005|01:45pm] |
I update this shit all the time now
with important stuff
motherfucker!
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| huh? |
[14 May 2005|04:22pm] |
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lately I've been caring for a village of industrial midgets
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| ok |
[19 Apr 2005|01:27am] |
does anyone want to play kickball in the park?
I think on saturday
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| I |
[11 Apr 2005|08:07pm] |
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I'm starting a new band, we're going to be called Winter Camo Pants.
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| shit |
[24 Mar 2005|12:35am] |
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I broke up with my girlfriend today.
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| anyone? |
[08 Mar 2005|08:49pm] |
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does anyone do at home dentistry as a hobby?
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| fu |
[13 Feb 2005|02:02am] |
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ck
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| do you? |
[07 Feb 2005|01:43am] |
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do you do things just so that you have stuff to write about in your livejournal?
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| UPDATE! |
[30 Jan 2005|07:07pm] |
I'm dating a celebrity now.
I'll maybe let you know more details later, unless the tabloids inform you first.
I assure you she is an a-lister.
I'm good at what I do.
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| Celebrities |
[19 Jan 2005|06:41pm] |
I know this may surprise you but truthfully I haven't slept with many celebrities. I know I know, you're probably thinking "Jeremy hasn't slept with celebrities? Doesn't he masturbate?" Well, yes, I do. I don't count that as sleeping with a celebrity though. A few years back I went on a couple dates with Jessica Alba but I never actually slept with her. There's been others with similar situations, I madeout with Paris Hilton at a party one time. All in all it's pretty disappointing. So I've finally, on the 19th of January decided what my new year's resolution is going to be. This year I will sleep with lots of celebrities. It'll be easy now that I have my mind set on it.
Anyway, I just wanted to let you guys know that.
Avril, I'll see you soon!
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| we're going to have an extra room... |
[17 Jan 2005|01:46am] |
we're going to have an extra room
when jeremy moves out at the end of the month seth and I are going to have an extra room. we've decided to eat the rent and just use the space for something fun. we don't have enough room to have fun right now so it'll be nice. what we do with it though has yet to be decided.
this was the list I compiled of possible ideas
-put cardboard down on the floor and have it be a breakdancing room
-start a band and use it as the practice space
-fill the room with pillows and beanbag chairs
-rollerskating rink room
-start a business in the room
-decorate it like a baby's room (just in case)
-make a meth lab (we probably won't do that one)
-get a foosball table and a little fridge and just drink in there
-or something else
do you think you could think of something else more fun?
what would you do with an extra room?
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